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A few years back as I was trolling along South Beach, a sidewalk vendor, who was promoting SNAPPLE, offered me a bottle. "No Thanks," I replied. Confused, he asked again, but this time he told me it was "free."

"Thank you, but no. I'm no thirstier just because it's free."

FM radio stations are running ads and promotions around the clock reminding us all that radio is free and we shouldn't have to pay for it. To this I say, "just because it's free, it doesn't mean it's better."

Radio has gone to hell. Unless you enjoy AM talk, Tom Leykis or you live in some small town and listen to some cool college frequency, there's absolutely nothing surprising about radio anymore. It has simply run its course. Is there a reason a station will only play the same songs from the same artists? Never mind that, keep the same artists, just play their entire catalog - not the same songs over and over.

The other night - now when I say 'the other night' I mean New Years Eve... I was at home, now when I saw 'I was at home', I mean prostrate in a Vicodin induced coma... I was watching various New Years celebration on TV. Now the retarded thing is, here on the West coast, they televised New York's celebrations at 1130 PST - basically nothing was live.

Anyway, I was in and out of consciousness when suddenly I jolted upright. Now it's happened to me before, but for some reason this time when I heard Ryan Seacrest's voice, I puked in my mouth. But everything was fine, I swallowed it down when Hillary Duff came on. So much for pain killers.

It's all spoon fed, precut, templated bullshit. Nothing is real. Reality TV isn't real. FOX and Clear Channel have slowly cut away at our individuality. Everything is so scripted and carefully written and scrutinized. Think about it, it's impossible that Ashley Simpson is as successful as she is. Do you know anyone who owns her album(s) if you do.. take a long look at yourself.

So we're now offered a choice. Pay for something and be happy with it, or settle for something that's free. Sure it may be the same as cable TV, with "57 channels and nothing on" but at least it's commercial free nothing.

I swear that radio stations know when I'm in my car - there are always commercials playing. And when they do get around to playing a song - it's the same phucking one. You know the one.. do do do da da da...

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