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natureofproject: Ok, I have had this thing for my boss for the longest time. I have bought her presents for christmas etc. Well I am pretty shure she knows i like her, at least i think. She has said when i hit 40 i am going to have sex with a 18 year old. (I am 18 and she is 28) She is married and getting a divorce. I want to tell her how i feel about her (we hang out outside of work also).

I have DEEP feelings for her and i realy want to be "that perfect guy" as her husbands has all beat her. I am so confused. I realy have no idea what my next step should be. I have shown her trust, honesty, and sincetivity. Basicly what every girl wants. I also have this EX following me making it look like we are still together i tell her we are not together but i dont know if that efects he thoughts at all.

I like this woman so much that i would hold sex till marrage and drop all bad habbits for her. (no i am not obsesed) I just feel happy when i am with her. Like if my serch is over kinda thing. Please help me. I realy need help with this one, all my friends tell me not to say anything. and i am afraid that she wil lthink i am: A perv, pig, "non-friend, that i am just her friend to get with her. etc. You know all the bad things that come to mind.

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SM's Response: First off, if you want to impress your boss, learn how to spell.

I had to pack a few bowls before answering this one - First off, listen to your friends. Under NO circumstances are you to tell this chick how you feel about her. I'm calling her a chick because I'm trying to illustrate to you that, though you think she shits roses, in the end, she's just 'a chick' so don't go getting all bent out of shape over her. Here's the thing Tommy, anything you do towards her right now will be ill perceived. It's as simple as that. She's going through a divorce - probably a shitty one - they all are. So the last thing she needs is her subordinate hitting on her. Age is not the issue, the fact that she's your boss, is. If she's a responsible employer, than she'll never have anything to do with you. Not now anyway. Sorry man.

Let's say I'm totally wrong - maybe she does want you - your plan of action must be exactly the same - say NOTHING to her. In fact, stop being a phucking kiss ass. Every girl wants, trust, honesty, blah blah blah... But it doesn't start out like that. Especially now that she's ending a brutal relationship. If anything, she just wants some fun now. So don't go getting all intense on her. At first they just want a guy they can laugh with. It all starts out with laughter... then...it usually goes down hill from there. I digress.

I know this advice is all over the place - but you've read the site, what'd you expect ;) At the end of the day, she is the one that will make the move. She's 28 and married, she knows what she is doing, so let her do it. With regards to your EX following you, it has no bearing on whether your boss will like you or not. In fact, it will help. So unless your EX is a complete annoying bitch, then let her 'follow' you.

Snap out of it man - go home, beat off and go meet some other chicks. Let things unfold naturally. Don't you dare tell her anything. Your actions are already pretty obvious. Calm down a bit. If she is worth it, then you'll wait. Like a WWII Japanese soldier in a cave, you'll wait until you know the war is over.

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