Pop culture Politics Perversion Advice Speedmonkey.net

AddThis Social Bookmark Button

Latest & Greatest

please stand by

Skank of the Week (NSFW)


Shauna Sand's Nipple

Dating Advice - Both

Advantage, Women

Details

Views: 275
Rating: 4
Votes: 1
Comments: 0

Rate

Images

Tags

Believe it or not, men are at a huge disadvantage when first meeting a woman.

Forget the fact that you haven't been laid in months, forget the fact that she knows you're about to ask her out... and never mind that her friends have already warned her about you...

All of this you can over come. Everything her friends say about you pales in comparison to what she wants you to be.

Nothing her friends can say will make her change her mind about,
"Mr .Perfect." You see, long ago in a galaxy far far different from ours...women have been sold an illusion of men.

We're supposed to be Fred Astaire dancing around lamp posts..some chivalrous mannequin who magically knows exactly how you are feeling all the time. But we're not.

We're ass scratching, burping, couch laying, "hard working" human beings who aren't always smiling and pleasant.

But for some reason, we're expected to be, "perfect." We're expected to be some kind of charming prince...or some guy on a horse...with a slipper of sorts that only fits you... any of this sound familiar?

But I still can't put my finger on why, oh why women expect us to be this way.

If we don't rush out and take you out for dinner or go dancing... man, will her friends ever hear about it. Then they'll go home, tell their boyfriend's and the pressure mounts.

So when you're nervously approaching the woman of your dreams, don't worry about the crap in between your teeth, because soon enough she'll discover that you're a normal guy, and your once charming smile will mean nothing.

Once she realizes that flowers don't come everyday and that brown tread mark in your pants isn't chocolate after all she'll be off looking for her slippers, and they won't be under your bed.

Much like we desire the hot porn star/Mother Theresa/Condoleezza Rice, women keep searching for that guy on a horse.

She'll find him - But only when she realizes that his horse may be a broken down Datsun and his Palace, a one bedroom bachelor pad.

Love us for it.

Read more dating advice

Comments

There are no comments on this item.


Name
Email
Comment
 

Top Viewed Stories

FMK

please stand by

Blogroll



don cherry

Speedmonkey - Pop culture, pics & more.

Dating Advice | NSFW | Celebrity Gossip | Galleries | Movie Reviews | Music Reviews | Video
Mixed Martial Arts | Hot 100 | Contact