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Guys you really need to lighten up on your relentless pursuit of the nookie. Something as fun as sex shouldn’t be so hard to get. Listen, here are some of the mistakes I’ve witnessed guys do that will kill your chances of tappen' that ass:

When you just met a woman you’d really like to date, don’t tell your mother about her right away. If you’re a mamma’s boy, she, your mom, is bound to find out some information from you like where the new lady works then show up and introduce herself as your mother! (I swear this happened to me. Loss his number real quick! Come to think of it I believe his name was Norman….BATES!)

If you’ve been dating a woman for a while and she’s not putting out, don’t tell her if she doesn’t have sex with you ‘she’ll get cobwebs’. Chances are if she’s not having sex with you, she is with someone. So, it’s safe to say your webster-tool doesn’t have a telescoping head to reach her nooks and grannies. (This was said to me by a guy I was dating and yes I was.) ;)

Making a girl laugh is a good thing, except if you’re standing there butt-ass naked yelling, "Say hello to big daddy!" And she’s pointing and laughing at your man-hood.

If you’re less than average, don’t draw attention to it. (This happened to a friend of mine several years ago…. and she’s still laughing.)

When you muster up enough courage to go and talk to a woman, don’t just stare at her flotation devisees! Look at her face, eyes, mouth and cheeks, no the one’s on her face. When she looks away, get your quickie glance in. Don’t stand there with your eyes popping out like Roger Rabbit, she might slap them back into your head, the one your shoulders. A little FYI: when you ogle at a woman you just met, hand over your dick and wallet because you just transferred THE POWER.

When a woman makes it CLEAR to you that all she wants is sex… GO WITH IT you lucky bastard.

Chances like these don’t happen very often. So, don’t ruin it by kicken’ every guy’s ass that talks to her when you happen to be at the same parties she is. (Sadly this happen to me… he never got a 3am call from me again.)

So, guys don’t take sex so seriously. Let things happen as they will; be cool, be goofy just be yourself and the booty will come looking for you.

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