Tag: Courtney Stodden

Courtney Stodden Knows How To Work A Hose

Courtney Stodden washing her jeep in Hollywood.  Times must be tough for her.  No white person washes cars in LA. D’uh.

Jesus Wasted His Death

courtney stodden easter bunny pic

So this is what He f8cking died for? Great.  I don’t even know in what category to put this chick.  She’s really not a babe, and certainly not a celeb.  Idiot?  Should I create a new category?  I should just call it, Idiot and put everyone in it, including myself for wasting my time seeking out, clicking, saving, coming up with some unfunny BS, crushing my lower back by hunching over my computer… Talk about someone who’s wasting their life.  Ugh.  Happy Easter everyone.

Courtney Stodden Living Large

I wonder how long it took her and her “husband” to put this photo shoot together?  The funny thing is, you can see the air conditioning unit behind her crappy curtains.  I’m guessing she lives in some 2 bedroom dump somewhere in Hollywood.  They took whatever clothes they had and spread them out all over the place to make it appear that she’s living in some mansion.

Courtney Stodden. The Little Engine That Could… not.

I ran into Courtney at the Grove about a month or so back.  She was trolling up and down the strip hoping for attention.  Except for a few rubber neckers, some poor camera man who no doubt was on the clock and of course your truly, none was given.  But she keeps trying.  These pics were taken in Marina Del Rey, hopefully she’ll make enough money for gas for the drive home.  I really think she needs some kind of exit strategy because whatever it is she’s doing, clearly isn’t working.  I mean big knockers and a tiny bikini certainly works for me, but I live in my mom’s basement.

Courtney Stodden Hates Attention

courtney stodden the grove

courtney stodden the grove

From Notsomebody:  Friends of mine were in from Vancouver. They wanted me to take them to the Grove. I’m glad I did, because they were able to see a true star in the making, Courtney Stodden. I decided to follow her and take a few pics. I had a few people come up to me and ask who she was and I didn’t have an answer. Her “husband” Doug Hutchison was clutching her arm, wearing the same crappy black outfit he’s had on for about a year. Don’t blame the guy though. I’m sure he’s pretty much broke and he’s pinned all his dollars and hopes to some weird publicity stunt, that judging by the one paparazzi that was there, isn’t working out too well.

Courtney Stodden Teaches Her Husband About Trains….mmm, hmm!

courtney stodden princess

Yup, this is gonna end well… B*tch probably sleeps 3 rooms over and forbids him to touch her. And by Maroon 5 she means… Dailymail:

‘I get up around 12 p.m. I make my mocha. I don’t care about anything else,’ she said, adding without irony, ‘A typical day for me is crazy.’

In addition to dressing up in sultry lingerie, the 17-year-old teaches her older, unhip husband about cool modern-day music.

‘There’s fine lines in between what we share and what we teach each other,’ she enthused. ‘I’ve turned him on to Maroon 5, train and all the new awesome bands.’

Courtney Stodden Is Full Of Goodwill…and Probably Silicone…Botox..

I f*cking hate the USPS.  Hate, hate, hate.  The employees are the laziest, rudest, nastiest, dumbest people I have ever met.  Walking into any USPS branch is like walking into a f*cking time machine.  Their all miserable and you can tell they hate their jobs because they hear about how shitty they are everyday from a-holes like me.  It’s a vicious circle and nobody seems to care.  They have bullet proof glass in front of them for a reason.  People hate them.  It’s like the “minimum flare” scene on Office Space.

Anyway, speaking of nasty here are Courtney and Doug…wearing the same tired clothes, going for the same tired reaction.  I’m guessing she can’t stand the guy.  They made some arrangement to drum up some publicity, they probably spend no time together and once this whole thing goes away, so too will they.

Courtney Stodden Used To Be Way Hotter

So if this s*it doesn’t sound alarm bells, I don’t know what will. Courtney Stodden is like a polar bear, she’s our canary in the coal mine. She’s an example of what we’ve been teaching our kids for the last 10 years. If polar bears are dying due to lack of habitat, or mercury poisoning, it sounds alarm bells for the rest of the world as they are on the front lines of defense, way up there in the north. They die, we die. Safe to say, looking at what Courtney has done to herself, we’re all about to die.

Courtney Stodden Is A Mess

Kids are stupid.  If you’re a kid reading this, you’re thinking, “no I’m not”  – but believe me, you are.  At 17, kids think they know everything.  They do stupid crap, which they later go on to regret.

Luckily for most of us, we were 17 before the Internets, as a result, there’s no proof.  But these days, everything is being recorded and stored.  So it’s pretty ‘effed up that Dr. Drew, Courtney’s parent and this f*cking creep Doug Hutchinson aren’t doing more to make this sick child realize that she has pretty much killed her future – and any hopes of being a normal adult.  So here’s 17 year old Courtney Stodden trying to explain her whole pumpkin patch ordeal.  Like anyone really cares.

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Courtney Stodden Turns Tricks

courtney stodden pumpkin patch

Weekend was OK. I managed to get some surfing in yesterday. It’s getting kinda cold, but the waves were awesome. The Jets won, which sucks. I hate Rex Ryan. All Blacks beat the French, in Rugby World Cup – which now means France has been beaten in one way or another by every nation on earth.

Anyway, here’s “17 year-old” Courtney Stodden with her pedo husband, unemployed Doug Hutchinson. Parents are supposed to protect their kids from doing stupid things. Because after all, kids are pretty much stupid and don’t realize how their actions today will affect what happens to them tomorrow. In this case, Courtney’s parents are complete and utter failures – assuming Courtney is 17 in the first place, which she is not.

Whatever, this whole stupid thing will blow over in a few months and Courtney will take to doing soft porn, flashing her panties, slipping her nipples… all of which I am in favor.  dailymail:

It’s not the first time she’s been banned from something due to her sexual antics, but on Saturday Courtney Stodden was asked to leave a pumpkin patch due to her inappropriate behaviour.

Courtney, 17, who is married to 51-year-old actor, Doug Hutchinson, was shopping for Halloween decorations in California over the weekend with her husband – but just couldn’t seem to keep her hands off of him.

Behaving inappropriately in a place that welcomes families with young children, it wasn’t just the couples public display of affection that prompted security to approach them – but the teenager’s barely-there outfit too.

N-ah! He’s Not Creepy At All…

courtney stodden MTV
Courtney’s mother has previously defended her daughter’s new husband, saying ‘he is not creepy’ despite the 34-year age difference

Score one more for the west. You know how in the East they have arranged marriages, or families even sell their kids off to help pay for the remaining infants? Well, it’s pretty much the exact same thing with these two weirdos. Where are the birthers? Find me her birth certificate.

Anyway, welcome to the new generation. Good for you MTV. I’m sure they’ll pick it up for a couple of season and soon enough we’ll have a new fad of teen girls hooking up with old men. Actually there already is show like that, it’s called To Catch A Predator.